The Other Side

Another week down, another week closer to the big day. Once again, my weekly training was uneventful, especially since I wasn't exactly consistent with it. You know when you throw my birthday into the mix it kind of took a back seat. I did however have a moment where I didn't want to to go to my the track training session last Tuesday. I realized there was a bit of intimidation on my part. As you know I was able to complete a mile time trial a few weeks ago in a little over 11 minutes a mile. Now, I know that's actually a pretty good pace, especially since my endurance is a bit low, however, when I compare myself to others on my team, I'm slow. I hate being slow, I hate people being done with their workout before me, and then watching me finish. As much as I'd like to think I'm immune to caring about what other's think of me, I'm not. I care and I'm trying to get over it, but boy is it hard. But I bite the bullet and went anyway, granted my shin splints showede their nasty head, and made the run a bit miserable for me, and I couldn't finish the whole work out. But I went, I did my best and felt bpretty good about it afterwards.
I'm trying to take a new approach on things, I could sit here and dwell on the fact that my shins hurt, I didn't do the complete workout, but I'm not. I'm looking at the other side, the side that I did what I could, I did not let my self doubt and insecurities prevent me from going.
People who have cancer don't ask to be uncomfortable, they don't get the opportunity to back out and take a break when they're feeling sick or having pain. That's been my motto, and I'm letting myself remember it as much as I can.